How are you feeling right now, Beth?
Right now, amused. Watching reruns of Big Bang Theory.
1. Well, focus. The interview is starting. ;) Please introduce yourself and tell us why you wanted to be an Erma.
I’m a freelance writer specializing in business travel and tourism articles, although under my work clothes is the baggy superhero costume of a humorist. Under that, there are some Spanx that could blow any second. I wanted to be an Erma so I could work with the very talented and savvy Stacey Graham, and because I knew a regular humor gig would stretch my writing muscles. I’ve always been a big Erma Bombeck fan, and I enjoy taking that to the next level with my fellow writers and readers.
2. I understand you write smart-alecky horoscopes with chilling accuracy. (I might have made that last part up.) Tell us about that.
When I was in elementary school, I told kids’ fortunes by copying the horoscopes out of the National Enquirer and selling them their own horoscope for a buck a pop. Today I write a newspaper funny horoscope column for the Lovely County Citizen and for the web. The first endeavor was much more profitable. I do have an alarming number of folks who tell me they plan their life by weekly horoscopes from Wisecrack Zodiac. I ask that they please don’t do that, since they could find themselves with a live ferret in their underwear and a really embarrassing video on YouTube.
3. What do you do want to be when you grow up?
Someone much better, braver and cooler than I am now. Currently I am a dorkasaurus.
4. I can certainly relate. *ahem* You are a geek. As a fellow geek, I can say that. Tell us about the Geek Book of Days.
The Geek Book of Days is a project I began more than a year ago chronicling nerdy holidays. I love that there is a weird, geeky thing to celebrate every day of the year, from the anniversary of the first PC to Nathan Fillion’s birthday. I started a website detailing a week’s worth of weirdness at a time, so I can share my geeky obsession with the masses. You’re welcome, masses.
5. What’s the most unusual payoff you’ve received from writing humor?
When I was a 9-to-5 drone, I wrote a ribald poem about P.M.S. and our female-packed office in one of those “Office of the Day” radio contests. I won us a free pizza, but the male DJs were too chicken to read the poem on the air. If they had, I suspect we would have received free chocolate and red wine, too.
6. Wimps. Anyway, any last words?
Sure, I have several last words. Here are some of my favorite conversation-enders:
“I bet you won’t stick your tongue in THAT again.”
“You know, these nuclear holocausts wouldn’t happen if I quit cooking and we turned the kitchen into a library.”
Profound words, indeed. Thanks for being courageous enough to go first, Beth!
And don't forget to join us on the 14th, when we
dissect interview Pauline Campos!